Little Hearts

I'm learning that my daughter is a human sponge.  She's watching my every move. Taking in every word that my husband and I say and she's imprinting those words on her heart.

Each night before climbing into bed, we sneak into Mackenzie's room and we pray over her.  And each night before I leave, I whisper into her ear, "You are the best thing that ever happened to me.  Don't forget that".  And then I melt when she climbs into my lap the next morning and whispers, "You know you're the best momma that ever happened to me?"  Literally, some days I am floored that a seemingly sleeping child is hearing my words and that they mean something to her.

And several times a week I smile as I hear my husband ask Mackenzie from somewhere in the next room, "You know you are loved?"  So it shouldn't come as a surprise to me when, while she and I are out grocery shopping, her hand slipped tightly into mine, she looks up at me in the produce aisle and she sweetly says, "Momma?  You know you are loved?"

Because she's a sponge.  She's hearing our words and she's taking them in and they mean something to her.

But just as our positive words are being soaked up, I am reminded daily that, so are our negative words. Last year I was introduced to fellow blogger Jen Bucker.  She is a beautiful mother of two and is an amazing writer.  She has an incredible gift and I hope you will discover her like I have.  While reading one of her posts a while back, she wrote a line that I have not forgotten and it replays in my mind almost daily.

Jen wrote, "Little hearts should not be broken by little things."

Sounds simple enough.  But is it really?

How often do we get overwhelmed by the constant barraging of questions from our babies?  "Mommy, can you help me with..." or "Momma, I went potty in my pants..." Or maybe your baby is so small that he or she hasn't even formulated words yet.  Maybe you hear grunts and whining, accompanied by constant pointing to objects.  And you just want to pull your hair out by the end of the day.

Sometimes, I just cringe at the sound of the word.  "Momma."   And, I just want a break from the responsibility that comes tagged to it.  Like, maybe if I pretend that the shrill sound of my title being shrieked from the next room isn't actually for me....then maybe, (just maybe) I won't have to come to its every beckoning?

How often do we trip over the dress up clothes or stub our toes on the tricycle that is lying out in the middle of the floor?  How often do we hear the sound of a plate clanking from the dining room table and then we wait, shoulders tense and holding our breaths, just knowing that we're about to hear the words, "Uh oh, I spilled...."  And then we're inevitably on our hands and knees picking up stray pieces of macaroni and scrubbing cheese off of the walls.  Huffing and puffing and thinking, "I don't deserve this."

And some days I just snap.  I holler and I yell.   I mutter under my breath, just loud enough for her to hear my frustrations.  I make her smaller than she already is.  I belittle her and I let her know she is an annoyance to me.  And it shows all over her face.  Her already big, blue eyes get even wider and more round and I can just see that something has changed by the way her lips twitch.  For a small second, I am no longer "the best momma that ever happened to me." I've become someone she is afraid of.

And it is then that, in the back of my mind I remember, Little hearts should not be broken by little things.  Sometimes I find myself whispering it deliberately under my breath.  "Little hearts should not be broken by little things. Little hearts should not be broken by little things...." 

And the truth is, maybe that one moment won't actually make a lasting impression on my daughter.  Maybe she will skip off and continue her playtime of princesses and treasure maps. And soon she will have forgotten that mommy was ever upset.  Maybe.

But a friend recently pointed out to me, that we never know the exact point or moment in our child's life when he or she begins to formulate memories.  And what do I really want those memories to be of?  The ones where she is made to feel embarrassed and belittled for simply being a kid?  I hope and pray that those aren't the memories she's making each day.

When I think ahead to the kind of future that I want for my children, I know in my heart that it isn't always going to meet up to my ideal.  One day, my daughter is going to come home from school and she'll be fighting back tears and feeling like she's worth nothing.  Some mean girl will have made a snide comment or a certain boy will have told her she's not pretty enough.  And those days will break my heart as much as they will hers.

But here's what I do hope for on those inevitable days. Rather than my words for her as a baby and as a child, enforcing those feelings of unworthiness as a teenager-- I hope that she will come back to the words we whispered to her in the dark of night while she was sleeping. The words she hears now while she is wearing her princess crown and dancing merrily around our little home.

That, when the mean girl tells her she isn't "cool enough", she'll remember, I am the best thing that ever happened to my momma.  That when the boy she's so desperately seeking a kind word from, isn't giving her the time of day-- she'll remember my husband's words, "You know you are loved?" I hope and pray that our words- of positive affirmation and of love and security, are the words that speak the loudest to her on those terrible days.

Little hearts should not be broken by little things.  Today was a bad day.  I lost my temper this afternoon.  Mackenzie missed her nap and I snapped at all of the little annoyances of my day.  She went to bed crying.  I could be so angry at myself.  And part of me is.  But tonight, I climbed into her little white bed. I pulled her close to me and I whispered, "I'm sorry."  And she whispered right back, "It's okay momma. I love you".

 And I think it is those moments that matter the most.  The willingness as a mother to admit when I've been wrong.  The humility to let my little girl know that even her momma sometimes loses her temper.  And tomorrow is a new day. Tomorrow I will make new choices and I will repeat again those words, little hearts should not be broken by little things.  Little hearts should not be broken by little things.  Repeat.

Grace Forgotten

In this season of yet, more change, I find myself being drawn back to old weaknesses and feelings of inadequacy. I've gone back to climbing the rugged mountains in life that I have been naive enough to think I had conquered.  But as I sit here tonight and write what is on my heart, maybe that's where I am finding some beauty in the midst of struggle.

The realization that I've been in this place before but back then, I struggled to see any beauty in it.  And so, even though I find myself frustrated by the circular patterns I so often seem to travel, I do recognize a glimmer of hope and redemption that I haven't always seen in the past.

Today I found myself again in a place of feeling overwhelmed and as if in a choke hold of suffocation, recognizing that the time until our little boy arrives is quickly approaching.  For the past three or so months I've masked all of these anxieties with the excuse that I am merely "nesting", as it is so often referred to in a light-hearted manner towards the end of pregnancy.  But I think deep down I know it has been more than that for me.

In a fit of feeling helpless and overwhelmingly behind about a month ago, I confessed to my husband that my obsessive necessity for lists and meticulously organized cabinets has come from a place of remembering how chaotic life was after our daughter was born.

The not feeling good enough.  The feelings of unpreparedness. Could it be possible to circumvent the haggardness of newborn days if I were more prepared this time around? And so, in a desperate attempt to prove to myself that it could be done, I've been running myself ragged trying to overly plan for this new little life.

Stocking freezer meals, planning grocery lists, organizing closets and purging unworn clothes to goodwill.  Mapping out the perfect layout for a nursery so as to make those sleepless nights more easy going.  I've laid awake at night planning out my next conquerable chore that would surely bring us closer to a place of being more "ready".  I've shed tears when, in my lowest moments, I've realized I'm just not working fast enough to be where I want to be by the time he arrives.

And, if I'm completely being honest, I've been wading through the sin of distrust and pride that I was so heavily ensnared by the first time around.

And all along, my servant of a husband has been bending over backwards to help me find a place of peace in the midst of the mess that has taken over my heart and mind. And at the same time, God has been whispering to me through the madness, reminding me to take hold of the one thing I was so in need of after our daughter was born.  Grace.

Grace.  Grace to let go of my imperfections and my fears of inadequacy as a new mom.  

Grace to let the dishes sit in the sink and to let the laundry pile up while I cuddle my newborn son and whisper to him how deeply he is loved.  

Grace to rely on family and friends to provide meals for us while we adjust to being parents of two.  

Grace that will allow me to take a guilt free shower while my husband takes care of the babies for a half hour.

Grace to feel tired and worn down.  Grace to shed tears when I am at my lowest points.

Grace to forgive myself on the days when I forget about this grace Jesus has so freely offered me.  

Because he hasn't asked me to be perfect.  

He has asked me to come to him when I am weary.  He has asked me to give my burdens to Him.

As I sit here tonight, my first baby sleeping soundly in the next room, my second baby resting beneath the rhythm of my heartbeat,  I am reminded of my ultimate purpose as a mother.  

God has asked me to be a good steward of the souls of my babies.  And how can I do that for Him when I am failing to be a good steward of my own soul?  How can I set an example of God's grace to them while I am distracted and beating myself up over the socks that have yet to be matched and the unmade beds I still haven't found my way to?  How can I mirror God's grace to my babies when I haven't quite found it myself?

And unless by some stroke of miracle, I am miraculously healed overnight of my pride and perfectionism, it is very likely that I will wake up tomorrow and face this struggle again...and the next day and the one after that. But I take comfort in the fact that this struggle isn't something that was even on my radar four years ago. 

And today it is.  Tonight, I am painfully aware of my weaknesses that are so often blinding and crippling.  My greatest hope is that, in the coming months as we welcome our baby boy, I will be reminded as I have been tonight of the grace that I so desperately need to be shown and to show myself as I navigate the this journey of parenthood.  

Life's About Changing

I've never dealt well with change.  From as far back as a little girl, I can remember struggling through the normal changes that come with life, whether it be from a big move to a new city, a friendship that had run its course, a move to a new school...  To me, every change just seemed like an end.  I could never see a clear, new beginning. My Momma use to let me lay my head in her lap, she would stroke my hair and do her signature "tickle my ear" way of soothing.  Many times, she would sing the lines from an old Patty Loveless song,

"Time will ease your pain,

Life's about changing,

Nothin' ever stays the same... 

Come let me hold you and I will try, 

How can I help you to say goodbye..."

And, even though I'm an adult now, and have learned to navigate the winds of change much more swiftly, I still often times find myself humming the lines to that old familiar song.  Tonight is definitely one of those nights.  I'm not sad and I'm not regretful.  But change is still bittersweet for me.  

Tonight, I put my dream job in the past and let God finish a work in my heart that I know He has been doing for a long time.  I never thought I would be the type of mom who could be "just" a stay at home mom.  When Mackenzie was born, I wanted more than anything to be able to work.  And when I joined my current company, I was thrilled to have an identity that I believed would keep me from becoming "just another stay at home mom".  Over the course of the past few years, God has slowly but surely been  giving me a new heart and a new desire.

A few months back as I was driving to work, I prayed and asked for a way to stay at home with my kids more. And, no joke, less than two hours later, I was sitting in the office of our Executive Director, listening to her tell me that the company was making changes and that my hours would be cut.  Oddly enough, I didn't see this as a blessing.  I was angry.  I'm not sure quite why.  Clearly, God was working boldly and swiftly to answer my prayer.  I just hadn't trusted Him enough to do so and take care of the needs of our family.

So, here we are, two months later, and tonight I made a change.  I punched out of my position for the very last time and I will punch in to a new one later this week.  I'll be staying home with Mackenzie several more days a week. To say I am thrilled would be an understatement.  It's been pretty incredible to see God work from the moment I spoke that prayer, to all of the details and blurs that needed to be filled between then and now.  Every single one of them has been filled.  No detail has been left unknown.  God really did hear my heart and He met me where I was at.

More than anything, this change for me tonight is not just a job change.  This change has been one of my heart.  I'm looking back on where I was three years ago, so desperately trying to hold on to the parts of me that "were" from before I became a mom.  And here I am today, loving the life I have with my little girl when I am at home.  I can work the rest of my life.  But I can only dance in my holiday socks, and do the wiggles with my three-year-old for a short time longer. She'll be in kindergarten before I know it and I'll be in my car doing the "ugly cry" after sending her off to her first day of school.  And on the way home I'll be humming that old familiar momma song...

"Life's about changing, 

nothin' ever stays the same..."

So here's to change.  Here's to living it.  Here's to experiencing it.  Here's to embracing it and being thankful for it.  Here's to feeling...well, a little bittersweet.  But here's to seeing the clear, new beginning that change always brings.

DIY Burlap Pillows

Recently, a friend and her husband were featured on the HGTV Show "House Hunters".  When the episode aired, Liz and Mike had some throw pillows on their bed that I fell in love with.  While watching, I told my husband, "We've got to get some of those pillows." 

Only, when I started searching different sites, I found that most of them cost $60 or more. 

And while I absolutely loved these ones by The Virginia House...

I'm cheap and we're on a grad school budget.

So, I started searching Pinterest for ideas on how to create my own.

I started by creating a stencil using the computer and card stock printing paper.  Follow along if you want the instructions.  If not, skip to the part where I stencil the letters.

Creating the Stencil

1. Start by choosing a font and by adjusting the letter sizes to how big or small you would like them.

2. Next, left click with the mouse and choose "font" on the drop down box.

3. Once the font box has opened, look for the "text effects" option towards the bottom and choose it.

4. Now you can choose "text outline" and "solid line",

(this should give you a solid black outline around your text).

5. And finally, change the font color to white (or a color that is lighter than the black outline).

*There may be an easier and more common sense way to do all of this but humor me...this was the best I could come up with.

6. Print the outline letter and get your box cutter ready.

7. I chose a box cutter rather than scissors and I'm so glad I did.  Make sure you angle the cutter down instead of straight up as your are tracing the letter.  If you miss using the blade, it won't actually cut the paper in all spots and you'll have to redo parts of the tracing.

8. Now you are officially done with the stenciling and you are ready to trace your letters onto the burlap.

As I wrote in my Burlap Wreath Post, burlap is very inexpensive and can sometimes be bought from craft stores for as low as $1.99 a yard. You can't beat that.  I bought one yard of fabric and cut it in half to cover both my throw pillows.

I'm almost embarrassed to say how easy this whole project ended up being.  I actually chose to stencil my letters with a metallic gold Sharpie Marker.  I could have used paint but I figured with a toddler running through my house, I just risked being knocked into and spilling paint everywhere.

And finally, once the letters were touched up, I hand sewed the burlap onto my old throw pillows.  The sewing took a little bit of time but I wasn't sure if I could use a sewing machine on burlap.

 

 

You can find a simple tutorial here on how  to recover pillows.  It really is as simple as  ironing the the hems and sewing the two sides of the pillowcase inside out.  When the two sides are sewn, flip the pillowcase to the correct side, stuff your pillow inside the case and sew up the bottom of the pillow.

And finally...

The total cost for this project was under $5.00.  Because we already had the throw pillows, the only purchases I made were the burlap and the  package of markers.

I'm pretty excited with how these turned out and I may add an "&" sign somewhere down the road to another pillow.  Hope I didn't miss anything!  I would love to see pictures if you make your own.  A special thanks to Liz & Mike for giving me the idea to create some of our own!

Love,

Love Affair With Burlap...

I've gotten quite a few questions about the burlap wreath I just finished so I wanted to add pictures to give others an idea of how to make one.  It was very simple and it's definitely one of my favorite DIY projects to date.

I purchased a yard of burlap at JoAnn's.  The burlap runs for $3.99 a yard and if you use one of their weekly coupons, you can sometimes get it for as low as $1.99 for a yard.  

Hence, the reason I'm having a love affair with burlap right now. 

I began by cutting the burlap into strips.

I used a single stray strand of the burlap and threaded it through a needle-

 (if you look closely at the above picture you can see stray strands of burlap fraying at the edges.  I tore those off until I had one long enough to use as a thread).

I connected the two sides of my first strip of fabric with the needle and thread.

I gathered the fabric in three pleats and brought the needle down from where I first stitched (at the top of my fabric) and brought the needle through each pleat.

Repeat this step.

Gather three pleats and bring the needle down and through the pleats (pulling tight after each set of pleats).  It should begin to look like the picture below.

And when you have finished and run out of your first strip of fabric, it should look something like the picture below.

Below is a completed strip of fabric placed on a wreath to give an idea of what it should look like.

I continued to to make pleats with each strip of cut fabric and I sewed them together until they were long enough to cover the whole wreath.

When the pleats were complete I used a hot glue gun to attach the burlap to the wreath. I also used stray burlap pieces and tied them around both the burlap and the actual wreathe to make it more secure.  The burlap blends  in so you cant see the tied pieces.  

Lastly, go to hobby lobby and go crazy in the dried flower department.

I could spend hours in that place.

In total this project cost under $5.00. 

Soon I'll post about our DIY burlap pillows.  I'm thrilled with how our first one turned out and I can't wait to share the set of them and explain how easy they were to make.

Love,

I Am Pro Mom

Yesterday morning, on my way to work, I got my first earful about the NYC "breastfeeding initiative".  As I have said before, my initial reaction when I hear anything that might sound even remotely critical of non-breastfeeding moms, is to get angry.  I've shared a little about my own experience with breastfeeding and it was pretty awful.  So when I heard a male caller on the radio sharing that he had to "sit his wife down and tell her that as a family, they would be breastfeeding", I was pretty pissed.  I was furious at Mayor Michael Bloomberg for creating an initiative geared towards women and babies and well, breasts (which he clearly does not have).  I was angry at this man who thought he could dictate his wife's choice of how to feed their child.  My first thought was, "How dare you!?"  These men can't even begin to understand the feelings and emotions and bodily changes that go on with a mom before, during and after giving birth.  So how can they say what we "should" and "shouldn't" do?  

With that said, I got out of my car and marched all hot headed into work.  I was ready to fight.  I was thinking of how to contact the radio station, who could get me the direct line to the NYC mayor and what moms might be willing to fight right along with me.  Now, roughly 24 hours later, I've cooled off.  I've cleared my head a little and I've thought and researched a ton on this new initiative. And no, I didn't even give a call to Mayor Bloomberg to give him my thoughts.  But I will give them to you.


First of all, let me just say, thank you, thank you, thank you, to all of my facebook momma  and non momma friends who respectfully and openly shared their views on this topic.  I can not tell you have nice it was to see a polite, respectful, "non-mommy-war" conversation taking place in a social media setting.  I was impressed.  Never at any point did I feel like judgement was cast or as if someone was taking aim at another momma's parenting style.  I loved that.  That is rare these days.  Way to support each other ladies.


Second of all, after doing some research and reading several articles on this new initiative, I can officially say that I am FOR (yes- you are reading this correctly), this initiative.  Well, mostly.  


From what I understand, the basic idea of this new "Latch On NYC" Initiative is this: The "Latch On NYC" initiative is voluntary for both hospitals and patients and it is designed as a way to encourage and support new moms in the effort to breastfeed.  Sounds harmless to me. Actually, it sounds pretty great.  


Here are  some more basic facts of this new initiative according to MedPage Today.

• Within hospitals, baby formula will be kept in locked storage rooms, cabinets, or automated medication systems, to which only certain staff members will have access. Staff members must record each time formula is used and the reason it was used, and that information will be shared with the city's health department monthly
• Discontinuing the distribution of promotional or free infant formula
• Prohibiting the display and distribution of infant formula promotional materials, including bags and other items branded by formula companies, in any hospital location.

Now, I don't have a problem with any of these specific guidelines.  While I don't love the idea of formula being "locked up" as if new moms are addicts foaming at the mouth and just waiting for nurses to leave their posts, it really isn't directly offensive to me.  

And, if you know me, you know I never turn down freebies and goody bags. However, I do feel that formula companies make their money off of new moms who are vulnerable and might revert to formula at the first sign of breastfeeding troubles. So with that said, I understand and support the removal of formula samples and goody bag freebies from hospital bedsides.  Deborah Kaplan, with the New York City Health Department says, "Mothers, pregnant women these days are bombarded by marketing materials, by email, by mail, in magazines, by the infant formula industry. When a mother comes to a hospital, the last thing she needs is more marketing." 

My biggest concern with these guidelines is two fold.  

First of all, I've heard that all women will be "counseled" or "lectured" each time they request formula.  They will be told the benefits of breastfeeding and the negatives of formula feeding.  

Secondly, nowhere in this initiative have I seen anything that has said lactation specialists will be hired or brought in to assist mothers who do choose to breastfeed.  

And here are the reasons I have these concerns:

1. I believe that at no other time in a woman's life is she more vulnerable and more susceptible to taking on shame and guilt.  After a baby is born, we as new moms need and crave someone- anyone- to affirm us and to tell us that we are making the best decisions for our new baby.  And speaking from my own experience, I know that had I been "lectured" (or even just reminded) at every feeding on why I was making the "lesser choice" for my daughter, it would have added and contributed significantly to the guilt and shame that I was already battling.  Is this the intent of doctors and nurses?  I don't really believe so.  I believe they will  be doing so without knowing how far reaching and damaging their words actually are.  Katherine Stone, founder of postpartum progress, says it well, "I believe that repeating over and over how you are essentially making the wrong decision for your baby, without any regard to why the mom has made the decision and why in this case it might be the best one, could end up being tantamount to shaming." 

2. If this initiative really and truly is a way to encourage and support new breastfeeding moms, then hospitals sure as hell better get some trained professionals on staff to assist and help new moms as  they start out.  And this is where I will share with you my experience.

I delivered Mackenzie at Prentice Hospital in the heart of downtown Chicago.  According to the website, Prentice is praised as a "One million square foot state-of-the-art hospital dedicated to providing care for the unique needs of women through all stages of life." Because of how new this hospital was and because of it's location, we had very high expectations for the care we would receive after Mackenzie was born.  I should preface this by saying that, after working in a health care setting myself for several years now, I am always hesitant to criticize because I know that often health care settings are given a limited budget and are short staffed.  I get it.  No amount of care will be perfect no matter how expensive or how new the facility is.  But in this case, I feel it is necessary to share and critique.  

After Mackenzie was born, we stayed at Prentice for three full days.  During our stay, I don't ever remember being seen by a lactation specialist (which according to the Prentice site, they have them on staff).  What I do remember is being seen by nurses who rotated shifts every several hours.  We were given different advice by each nurse that we saw.  So much varying advice that Jeremy and both became incredibly overwhelmed.  Mackenzie would not latch, my nipples were not extended enough to allow her to latch, my milk hadn't come in yet and even when it did finally come in (on day 3), I still wasn't producing enough to give her a full belly. We left the hospital on that third day, feeling incredibly discouraged.  We were no closer to understanding how to feed our new baby on our own and we were being sent home with a load full of (yes!) baby formula. 

Once home, we hired a lactation specialist to visit us.  She charged (I kid you not) $100.00 an hour for her help.  And because we felt desperate, we paid through the roof.  We just wanted someone to teach us how to feed our starving child.  And when she got to our home, that's exactly what she told us.  That Mackenzie wasn't getting enough at her feedings and that we would have to supplement with formula.  Over the next six weeks, feeding at our home became a nightmare.  The schedule went something like this: Feed for 30 minutes on each breast using the plastic nipple (an hour total), supplement with a bottle for another 20 minutes.  And I would pump between each feeding to try and increase my supply.  Repeat. Our life revolved around feeding and trying to get feeding "down".

Six weeks after Mackenzie was born, our breastfeeding nightmare came to an abrupt halt.  On a Friday night I woke up to the most excruciating pain I have ever experienced.  I was hospitalized that night for dehydration, multiple infections and kidney stones.  We were told that I would have to "pump and dump" for two weeks while Mackenzie drank solely formula.  Because I was never producing enough breast milk in the first place, we had literally none saved up in our freezer for an emergency like this.  What's worse (and this is where I will again, stress a lack of hospital support), is that after waking up from surgery, my first and only request was that someone bring me a breast pump.  I was engorged and in pain and leaking.  I waited hours and hours for that pump.  It never came.  I asked multiple times.  By the time I was released from the hospital that night, my entire hospital gown was drenched in breast milk.  I literally could have wrung my gown out with sticky milk.  My supply was completely gone.  I was incredibly embarrassed and frustrated.   And so, 6 weeks after giving birth, in that same hospital that I first decided I was going to breastfeed, I quit.  I was done. I waved the white flag.  

Hospital support?  Ha! What support?  This is the first time since giving birth that I have actually written out my breastfeeding story.  And now reading it back to myself, I am shaking my head in disgust. I am in full support of this initiative IF and ONLY if, hospitals leave out the "guilt" tactic and in turn provide trained, licensed professionals who are there to aid and SUPPORT mothers as they learn to breastfeed.  Oh, and provide a dang breast pump for crying out loud.

One online writer Moxie, says it very well. She writes, "Had I been mayor I'd have gone about it in a different way, by requiring any formula company that wants to market directly to consumers in a vulnerable position to fund the salaries of three full-time lactation consultants for every 10 beds in a maternity ward so there is always an LC available to troubleshoot problems, along with providing training in breastfeeding once a year for every RN, LPN and MD on the floor."  Can I get an Amen?  I like the way this woman thinks.  

I'm almost done (I promise).  I guess the biggest thing I want to say after having done my research and having shared it is this: 

I am pro-mom.  I am 110% in favor of anything that will provide emotional and physical care for the well being of all moms out there.  Just because my own experience with breastfeeding was poor, doesn't mean I don't want other moms to succeed.  And if this initiative will in fact help moms to succeed in breastfeeding, then that is exceptional and I will support it.  

With that said, being pro-mom also means that I will fight tooth and nail to eliminate the nasty, guilt and anxiety provoking tactics that this world uses to make mommas feel less of themselves.  I get angry when I hear of moms pitting themselves up against other moms.  My blood boils when I hear of mothers who are criticized and torn down to made feel less of themselves because of their own personal choices for their families.  There's something very wrong with that.  We are strong, capable women.  And why should we be bullied into thinking otherwise?  I hope more than anything, that this initiative does act as a successful support system for new moms and that it doesn't further fuel the "mommy wars" that I so deeply despise.  I hope this new initiative means that we are taking a step forward in an effort to encourage and support mothers in this already tough role we have.  This is what I hope.

Not Your Average Interview...

Mackenzie Leigh at 3 Years Old

Once again, Pinterest provided a great idea and I ran with it...

Ask your child every year on his or her birthday, the same questions and see each year how the answers change.  So here are Mackenzie's 3 year old interview questions.  

*I tried my very best to quote these answers exactly as they were given.  No edits!

1. What is your favorite color? "Pink!"

2. What is your favorite toy? "Ummm.  Hmm. What do I like? My purse!"

3. What is your favorite fruit? "Lemonade!" (I started to argue that this wasn't a real fruit but then I realized, well, it kind of is...haha.)

4. What is your favorite tv show? "Max and Ruby!"

5. What is your favorite thing to eat for lunch? "Ham and cheese sandwich."

6. What is your favorite outfit? "Ohhh...what do I like on my shirt?  I like Larry and Bob." 

To which I said, "You don't have a Larry and Bob shirt." "Ohhh...what do I like then?  I like a dress with flowers on it!"

7. What is your favorite game? "Basketball!"  To which I asked, "Have you ever played basketball?" "No, but when I get big and strong I want to play basketball with you!"  "How bout soccer ball?" 

8. What is your favorite snack? "I like macaronie." "For a snack?" "Okay, I like goldfish."

9. What is your favorite animal? "I like Grover and Abby."  Once again, I was going to argue but....are they not animals?  I think they are?? "Okay, what about your favorite Zoo animal?" (more what I was originally aiming for) "Elephants!"

10. What is your favorite song? "The Taylor song.  The people throw rocks one."

11. What is your favorite book? "Pete the Cat!"

12. Who is your best friend? "Abby." (Next door neighbor)

13. What is your favorite breakfast food? "Pancakes and waffles."

14. What is your favorite thing to do outside? "Play house!  And make food in my house."

15. What is your favorite drink? "Hot chocolate!"

16. What is your favorite holiday? "Halloween."

17. What do you like to take to bed with you at night? "Teddy!"

18. What is your favorite thing to do with mommy and daddy? "I like to help you clean up."

Let's see if this is the same answer next year ;)

19. What was your favorite birthday memory? "My tricycle." 

 

20. What do you want to be when you grow up? "I want to play something...""Yes, but what kind of job do you want to do?" "I want to be a doctor." "Will you be a doctor for me when I am sick mommy?" "Yes, of course." 

20. What makes you sad? "When I go poo in my pants." (She'll kill me for this one someday)

21. What makes you happy?  "Pancakes and playing with my toys." (Both of which she was doing during this interview.  I think they were at the forefront of her mind.)

22. What are you most excited for right now? "Papa and Grandma and Aunt Kels! And Teddy's birthday party! And singing to him."